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  • Hi,
    I would just like to say thanx for everyones advice, as always telling somebody helps!! I actually told my area manager today and she said that that behavour is completely unacepable and she is going to sort it out. So there you go the insicure bully is going down. Thank you. :bounce_ci

    And the weekend is here Ave IT!! :weee:

    my girlfriend used to work in some data imput place, and the boss incharge there, hazel, was a proper bitch. summin seriously wrong with her. the whole office seem such a shitty place to work, it was dead clicky and the boss had her clicky reptilian mates that used to sit at the front and also used to try bullyin people. there was loads of gossip and back stabbing all the time. it was mostly middle aged woman that worked there cept for gfriend who was about 20 at the time. the boss used to pick on her really bad, not that she was bothered, she just got on with it. but she used to scream at her across the office infront of everyone if she made any mistakes. while at the same time her nephew who was apparently really incompitent got away with everything.
    in the end the company closed that office down and offered everyone a transfer to another office in the next town, the boss got offered a transfer, but not as a boss, just as a normal worker. ha which she declined.
    last i heard her husband had gone bankrupt and they were well in the shit.
    aww shame aint it.:lol_crash

    Hay, i just want to make sure you’ve covered your back…

    Once they have been employed for one month, all employees are entitled to a written statement of terms and conditions. From 1 October 2004, this statement must include details of the employer’s grievance procedure. The employer can choose how s/he gives these details to the employees, for example, in the contract of employment or as a letter setting out the procedures.

    Have you been employed for over a year? and do you have an employment contract?

    Under the standard grievance procedure, the employee must send the employer a written statement of grievance, or a copy of it. This is known as a Step one letter. A questionnaire, for example, in a potential discrimination case, does not constitute a statement of grievance. The employee must keep a copy of the letter and proof that it has been given to the employer, for example, s/he may wish to send it by registered post, or deliver it by hand and have someone witness the delivery.

    The regulations do not set out how the employee must set out the reason for the grievance. The government has produced a draft standard letter which shows that a grievance letter should be signed and should include:-

    1. the name of the employee
    2. the name of the employer
    3. the date
    4. the date of the matter the employee is making the grievance about and
    5. details of the actual grievance
    6. a request for a meeting to discuss the matter.

    By law… you need to follow complaint procedure… Put every bit of communication concerning problems in writting as proof just in case they turn around and dismiss you for a different reason… at least that way, you could still have a case for discrimination and unfair dismissal…
    Between an Employment tribunal or ACAS… i would opt for the tribunal.

    And the bullying goes on! My next step wil be to write a letter, I have told my area manager who in turn told my manager what I had said to her.
    On monday morning me and my manager had a formal discussion which is supposed to involve somebody with a completely unbiased view taking notes, my manager had a person who was completely biased and on her side take notes. I had 2 people in the interview and was made to tell them both what my problem was, the person taking the notes also got involved in the discussion and made it quite clear that she was on her side! Appaerently if my area manager saw the notes she had taken she would rip it up and say it was just “tittle tattle”. Needless to say my manager is denying everything. See I dont no what to do now really because to be fair she has been kind of nice to me these past couple of days, perhaps it was a case of her not realising her actions and now she has been told she may stop. Should I go through with the complaint or should I leave it and see if it starts to happen again?

    skattyasfuk wrote:
    And the bullying goes on! My next step wil be to write a letter, I have told my area manager who in turn told my manager what I had said to her.
    On monday morning me and my manager had a formal discussion which is supposed to involve somebody with a completely unbiased view taking notes, my manager had a person who was completely biased and on her side take notes. I had 2 people in the interview and was made to tell them both what my problem was, the person taking the notes also got involved in the discussion and made it quite clear that she was on her side! Appaerently if my area manager saw the notes she had taken she would rip it up and say it was just “tittle tattle”. Needless to say my manager is denying everything. See I dont no what to do now really because to be fair she has been kind of nice to me these past couple of days, perhaps it was a case of her not realising her actions and now she has been told she may stop. Should I go through with the complaint or should I leave it and see if it starts to happen again?

    I’d monitor the situation and ensure that she is not just being nice in the short term.

    as you have already “stirred the pot” though the other thing I would do is research your employers immediate competitors and see if they are hiring (check that they do not treat their staff in a worse manner though!). do not however let on you are looking for a new job because of bullying – say its because you want to progresss in your career! If the organisation as a whole is not prepared to be progressive and accept that young people can be good workers then maybe their payback could be seeing you become a manager at a rival store – and eat away at their takings!

    is there a big age / culture difference between the two of you? a lot of older people automatically assume that the youth should “respect” them and many refuse to accept that young people have minds on their own – when they stand up for themselves they often whinge about “political correctness” and “lack of discipline”.

    Auch wenn du am Abgrund stehst, und gar nichts mehr verstehst,
    wachen Engel über dich, halten dich im Licht und lassen dich nie fallen.

    Not knowing your situation i can only advise on what i know… How long have you been employed there? what was concluded at the end of the meeting?… have you been given anything in writing?
    I would say write the grevience letter… note down everything your not happy about and requesting a metting to try to clear the air at least that way the problem might stand a chance of getting sorted… Seriously, thats my best advise to you… it won’t do no harm and if things go wrong then it’ll help you!

    hey guys, just been reading this thread, me and my workmates have just complained to higher management about our ‘assistant manager’…i’m pretty freaked now though, waiting for everything to explode in our faces…we’re just sick of his shit though, he slags us all off to each other, gives us all his work then skives off, speaks to us like 3 yr olds, the list goes on, basically causes a lot of tension in the team….i guess i just wait for the explosion now!! we are so desperate though..HE DRIVES US INSANE!!!!!
    :omg: :frown:

    funny cat wrote:
    hey guys, just been reading this thread, me and my workmates have just complained to higher management about our ‘assistant manager’…i’m pretty freaked now though, waiting for everything to explode in our faces…we’re just sick of his shit though, he slags us all off to each other, gives us all his work then skives off, speaks to us like 3 yr olds, the list goes on, basically causes a lot of tension in the team….i guess i just wait for the explosion now!! we are so desperate though..HE DRIVES US INSANE!!!!!
    :omg: :frown:

    without incriminating yourself, what sort of business is this and what ages are involved?

    sadly I’ve found this to be a commonplace situation in smaller businesses where there are a lot of younger staff – or perhaps junior staff in their 20s and someone just slightly older but who still has a “laddish (or laddette”) attitude

    there’s a lot of competition about particularly with the constant threat of downsizing/outsourcing to most businesses, everyone is trying to fight their corner

    its got to the point where I prefer to work in organisations where the managers are in their middle years and a bit more conventionally-minded in their business management methods; even if it does mean I have to wear a tie or go to boring meetings… surprisingly enough particularly if they have more secure jobs it works better as they don’t see you as a threat

    I’m lucky though I work in a place where I am respected and also “left to get on with my job” without micromanagement (often though because managers aren’t quite sure of the technical aspects of what I do!)

    it could be a lot worse though – I’ve become aware of an incident where a falling out over a start up business has ended up in actual violence, and it looks like not only are there injuries and prison terms for people; the whole venture may fold and everyones dreams are fucked..

    Auch wenn du am Abgrund stehst, und gar nichts mehr verstehst,
    wachen Engel über dich, halten dich im Licht und lassen dich nie fallen.

    well we work in a college and we are all early-mid twenties, he’s about 30 and he’s pretty much the opposite of laddish he’s a gay man that has a liking for dressing like women! i know it could be worse but it’s been such a long time and it makes work such a miserable place to be, i was going home crying this time last year…..i think our boss has actually gone to talk to him RIGHT NOW…………EEEEEEKKK!!!!

    funny cat wrote:
    well we work in a college and we are all early-mid twenties, he’s about 30 and he’s pretty much the opposite of laddish he’s a gay man that has a liking for dressing like women! i know it could be worse but it’s been such a long time and it makes work such a miserable place to be, i was going home crying this time last year…..i think our boss has actually gone to talk to him RIGHT NOW…………EEEEEEKKK!!!!

    perhaps “laddish” was the wrong term, but just because he’s gay wouldn’t remove his competitive mentality which is what I am getting at (this equally applies to women in management positions who often bully subordinates of both genders)

    there are plenty of aggressive gay men like that in the media industry where I used to work. as a straight male I had to be careful as well if I complained about their attitude as I could be accused of homophobia/intolerance…

    Everything else fits in with this situation I described earlier and its a big problem in the education sector as there are a lot of strong personalities about, and everyone is trying to prove themselves. It needs to be stamped out though or the bad attitudes can carry through to the students…

    Auch wenn du am Abgrund stehst, und gar nichts mehr verstehst,
    wachen Engel über dich, halten dich im Licht und lassen dich nie fallen.

    Eyup Skatty,
    make a log of her behaviour as evidence before making any complaint. Not sure who you would complain to unless it is part of a chain. Do you really have to stop there? I know it is undesirable to give in to bullies, but sometimes it can be better to admit defeat. I suffered minor bullying (they probably didn’t even recognise it as bullying) in previous job as machinist (like being at school again, not that I was bullied at school). I was laid off when downturn in economy occured (1998), prompting me to follow my dream. Started media degree, after two years had to get job and am now in process of finishing degree. Every cloud etc. I’m not saying college is the perfect answer for everyone, but I’ve now turned 40. I presume you are younger and could well find that there are better opportunities out there.
    Keep smiling and DLTBGYD!

    I have to say I have been bullied in more than one of my work places before. In my first ever job I had the guy who owned the places daughter as an assistant manager. I was supposed to be a trainee travel consultant .. trainee being the word but i actually ended up training myself as I was made to dust shelves and all the stuff a cleaner should do. Anything I did was reported back to her daddy. She would put me down all the time in front of clients and everyone. I just sat back and took it but one day I was taken aside and told after 11 months and 2 days that I had done a fantastic job but they were letting me go. I was ready to let it go but my dad was not. We went to the CAB ( citizens advice Bureau) and they took on my case. I ended up settling out of court and got money i could have never got in court.

    I then later on worked for another company and I ended up working for a manager who worked for the above company and she treated me like crap. Well she told in front of all the call centre staff that i had done something wrong when she should have taken me into another room. I had done nothing wrong but stand up for myself about a booking worth £12000 that I had loads of work on. She then said I was spoilt just because I got a lift to work from my folks because public transport was crap where I lived. She should have known she lived in the same place as me!!!

    I complained to my managing director and he did nothing but set up a meeting with my manager.. she said she would do the same again… I gave up after being upset and depressed for 4 months and handed in my resignation. Loads of people did the same but looking back it was a cop out but I happy now.

    It is different with different jobs depends what you think is the best though.

    If I was you I would make her life hell she is obviously jealous of the good work you are doing but unfortunatly she has friends in the right places.

    All I can say is keep at it babes … the saying is true it is easier to find a job from a job xxxxxxxxxx

    Quote:
    Increase your self-confidence. This may reduce your susceptibility to bullying, and make you feel better about yourself all round. . Well, speaking as a guy, I always wished I’d taken up a martial art as a kid, so by the time I got into the potential bullying time in my life, I knew how to handle my body, and knew what it was like trying to shift someone else’s body weight around, and how to throw an effective punch, and shit like that basically. If someone knows you can handle yourself they are much less likely to give you any shit. I started trying to build my muscles up when I was 13, and I am quite strong now, but I still need to take up a martial art because I still don’t know how to use my body effectively. I’m almost 22 btw, but as I said, you can get bullied at any point in your life, if you are a quiet introverted person like myself.

    Quote:
    It has been quite sad reading all of these posts and silverfox has actually stated a very important point, in fact all the points raised have been valid, but i was going to suggest martial arts as it not only teaches you how to use your body but also gives you self confidence and as you say if people know you do it they tend to leave you alone. I am very fearful about bullying in schools – they extent to which these youngsters are prepared to go is shocking (today hearing about a girl repeatedly stabbed in the dinner queue) But i agree with GL here these are no longer ‘kids’ but a by-product of our society. As you say GL they are mini consumers and all that entails. I think the only way to tackle the situation is to just take the bull by the horns and adults take responsibility for the morality that is being instilled into the younger generation. CHILDREN (which ultimatley these young scalliwags are and should again be viewed as such). As you say GL they see violence as a ‘norm’ and all the role models are ‘gangsters’ for fucks sake. Anyway this rant has come from a mum who doesn’t take shit from kids!! I see so many mums not laying down the law when they are young – this is where the problem stems from – RESPECT. Most of these little shits don’t respect their mum, home etc so you can expect little else. but if the adults are not correcting this they don’t know any different. sorry just realised i’ve digressed from the subject of martial arts into a rant on discipline to curb potential bullies. But yes silverfox i think you should pursue martial arts – as i say it will give you confidence! I have be teaching my son tae kwon do since he was 3. I think it is particularly important as although not by any means small he is very soft natured (except when jumping around shouting ‘london acid cityraaa ‘)and could easily be targeted for this reason. So positive energy on both sides of the coin – for the bullies to be shown discipline and respect (people see that as whip cracking i actually think its positive – free thinking and rebellian should come when you’ve learnt how to swim with the current – then you can swim against it) and for the recipiants to engage in confidence building activities..

    PLUR – Doing it the old skool way x t’rah

    Hey, I have a new job!! One that is monday to friday! 9-5 cant wait I can actaully have a social life again and begin doing proper things at the weekend! I find myself just going to the local places coz I have work the next day!! Now I can do wot I want and if I want a weekend off I dont have to take is as part of my holiday! and I get all of the bank holidays off over xmas to! Happy new year to me!! :cloud9:

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Forums Life Bullying