Party Vibe

best advice based on dealing with [admitedly mostly adult] ADHD and ADD friends is:

work out which are the problem areas:
getting places on time, sitting still, concentrating, etc [make a list]

sit down and ask your son what would help him to concentrate; he might have good ideas
if not pick the biggest problem for you and discuss it with him [ dont fight about it; you are on the same side]
work out a solution which you both think can work and work at it together

things to remember are:

the attention span is very short; 10-20 mins max at a time:bounce_m:

they will usually concentrate better when they are moving around so dont ask them to sit still; their attention drifts away:bounce_m:

get him involved in sports which will help him to burn off that excess energy he has so much of:bounce_m:

they have a few things which they are very interested in and they have no trouble concentrating on those; this is called hyperfocus and is normal for the condition:bigsmile:

they work best with constant praise if they are doing well and reminders when they drift off the thing they should be concentrating on:bigsmile:

dont expect miracles and learn to laugh at the things that go wrong; it is nicer all round than being stressed:bigsmile:

people with this condition are NOT lazy, stupid or crazy; dont ever tell them they are:you_smart

work out a way of organising your son that works for him; for example always doing the same thing at the same time every day – they dont handle chaos very well. :bigsmile:If they have a regular timetable it helps them to remember things better; also to have rituals for doing things like for example when you go out to ask do i have my keys, bag, wallet, phone and always to do it in the same order

I live with a person with ADD and the thing i had the most trouble with was that they never remembers to do the things i ask and have to be reminded a million times to do stuff:alien_abd so we are trying to use pattern planning – same thing every time on the same day eg cleaning toilet on saturdays, etc
so far so good

:idea:join some of the forums for ADHD in usa,uk as they are full of people just like you with ‘problem’ children who can give you support:idea:

any one else have any advice? raverbaby?

ange1 it just happens like this; my brother had ADD [it was called something different then] and he is ok now; works in finance [he is interested so its ok] but when he was at school he always had problems because they compared him to me :you_smart:you_smartvery unfair

:group_hug you will get through it :group_hug

and he will be worth all the trouble; they are very special people:bigsmile:

that reminds me: my mother used to give us a cup of milky [weak] coffee in the mornings to make us less hyperactive [this works because the caffeine has the opposite effect on hyperactive children to normal adults]

[oh yes i used to be a hyperactive monster; slept 6 hours a day; my parents had to lock me in my room at night so they could sleep…i only slept from midnight to 6am…:crazy_fre:crazy_fre]

[where did all that energy go? :crazy_fre]

:rant::rant::rant::rant:hey thats not just kids; if you try and get taken seriously when you say an adult has ADD they say the same and that they just need to pull themselves together:rant::rant::rant::rant:

:you_smartas if they havent tried; it just sets them up to fail in a system which doesnt help them and leaves them feeling shite about themselves:rant::rant::rant::rant:

:rant::rant::rant::rant::rant::rant: