Lost little lamb Hi. I've been on the drug forums. I ran across this site somehow. I am aften looking for people to talk to at night. I like my crystal. So, there it is. I'm having navigation problems a little, so please bear with me.
SUP SUP What's up everybody! I'm new here and I can't wait to hop into the forums and discuss. Call me "Slim" for short! Hopefully this forum is more interesting than FB, good God. LOL Anyways, HMU on a PM if you wanna chat privately! Happy posting!
Mental Health First of all I'd like to give an advanced apology for all the obscenities in this post, if you're offended by foul language I would discontinue reading now.....
I'm sure most of you at this point have already read at least one post where I refer to my fluctuating mental health but for those of you who are unaware I'm battling with an emotional disorder (perhaps bipolar but the doctors can't decide) for the last 10years. The reason isn't really important at this point but incase you're wondering why my problems started I suspect it was due to my biological dad leaving me and my mother when I was an infant and my stepfather was an abusive cunt.
I was fighting my demons alone for many years and despite obvious depression and an attempted suicide at 17 nobody ever looked further into it or asked if I was really okay. So I'm guessing I hid it pretty well for no-one to pick up on it. As well as my erratic mood swings insomnia has also loomed over me since the age of 15 although this only became a real problem back in October last year, not sure what caused the change but I was literally not sleeping at all for 4-5 days of every week pretty much for around 4 months. This had repercussions on my mental health and my mood swings became more erratic and more severe. Feeling unable to cope and seeing the strain it was placing on my girlfriend I conceded that I probably required professional help.
This is where I start to get real pissed off and start swearing a lot. It feels as if since I've opened myself up and admitted to my problems all people do is question my fucking competence. It really seems like I'm unable to act now without someone asking if I've acted in such a manner because I'm unwell. FUCK OFF YOU JUDGEMENTAL PRICKS! Why is it every single time I have an off day or I'm in a bad mood some cunt assumes it's because of my mental health?!?! I am still capable of experiencing emotions outside of my condition you ignorant wankers. Take today for instance, my girlfriend has come back from a visit to her sister's in London and essentially accused me of cheating on her while she was away. Okay so she didn't directly accuse me but asked questions then said she didn't believe me. That's as good as being accused is it not? Then she fucking wonders why that would upset me the stupid bitch, oh that's right it must be because I'm unstable!
I feel I was better off when I was fighting this alone, I managed nearly 10 years of it but after just under 6months of being open about it I'm really fucking struggling to compose myself.
Just so you know I am able to recognise when I'm having an episode and this has resulted in me becoming highly self analytical, I've spent years studying and questioning myself so I'm extremely aware of my condition and capable of distinguishing between I'm upset because I'm an emotional fuck up and I'm pissed because such a person is a twat. Also for whatever reason my sleep pattern fixed itself around mid February as did my hyper mood swings. I've generally been feeling better in myself since but I've had plenty of other outside factors pissing me off and getting me down. My brother seems to be the only one who listens and understands, everyone else seems to have impression I'm emotionally incompetent. Seems the mentally unwell are much better at handling this sort of instability than the 'normal' people.
Anybody else have any similar experiences? Whether you are/were the ill person or you were one of the friends, family or whatever I'd like to hear. I know there can be a stigma attached to this sort of ill health, only recently have I actually understood why, so if you're not comfortable discussing it on a public forum feel free to PM me.123
shyness so im super shy, and embarassed about my body to some extent. i was in a car accident and lack of activity has made me... squishy. how would one of you overcome this?
Im addicted to crack again. I was at my best friends house and my ex came over. She had a vile of crack cocaine and she offered me some. Its been a while for me using crack anyways, but they use it all the time. I got a bit and put it in my bowl and I was cracked out all day. Man I need some crack right now bad. My ex went back to her home town and now I can't get my hands on the junk. Lol funny thing is I love crack cocaine.
whats your favourite legal high? what legal highs would you def not take? hi everyone, im chris, fairly new here. i used to take legal highs in my first two years at uni but had to give them up, they made it too difficult to focus at uni. after that i went on to become a researcher of.....legal highs of all things. basically just decided to study something i was really interested in, the psychoactive effects of legal high substances, what legal highs people like and what ones people def want to stay away from.
now im leading the Legal Highs Survey, which is open to everyone 18+ in the UK. the survey is at Legal High Survey | Have your say about legal highs in the UK
id really appreciate if some of you guys took some time to tell us a bit about the legal highs youve ever taken, your favourites, what you felt after taking them and some other questions about legal highs. its all anonymous and confidetial, and ill be using the findings to give other people who take legal highs and people who are curious about taking them, better information on which to base their decisions to take legal highs.
hope you guys will take the survey, your insights into legal highs are what we need to shape drug policy in this country.
Chris x
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