Advise on what to do?

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Advise on what to do?

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October 15, 2006 at 8:27 pm

#675764
1

quietRIOT

@quietriot

Member
i need some advise not going into all the details coz they are private but heres where i need advise cos i dont know what t do….i split with my soon to be ex a few months back ..he was all amicable about itan we ll be freinds…i ended it coz i simply werent happy an he too said he werent 100% happy either ..only i didnt want to plod along…so …it was for best all round..now hes seems to have realised im not going back hes turned all nasty,threatening me with stoppinhg morgage payments an saying ill have to find somewhere to live….ive got 2 childern but since we split he said he would but he dont bother with them…im so fukin mad today with him…just cos i went out at the wknd he rang me an gave me loads of abuse ….im this im that…i give as much back cos i was angry at him …its nothing to do with him what ido….ok hes left a house we re still init…hes moved jobs hes at his mums …thats not my fault…why should i feel guilty for ending it …why should i bury my head in the sand an make do…..i tried for 6mths to make it work ..but you cant force it……i loved that man but i was so happy it wa going to be a amicable split cos we make better freinds……anyway thats all gone to the walll….today .we have a dog who we all love an the kidsespecially…i let my ex take the dog for the wknd ..hes phoned me an told me we arent getting the dog back he lives in sheff im miles away…i paid for the dog £150..00 the kids are heartbroke …i have no recept…i dont know whether to go see the farmer an ask if he ll write me a recept out to prove hes mine …phone the cops an send them round …or go to his mums an demand our dog back…my heads in bits…how can someone be so selfish…..:cry:
October 15, 2006 at 10:57 pm

#726129
1

freespirited

@freespirited

Member
what a horrible suituation!
ok well you have to be strong for your two kids!
so the house your at now is that a pernament thing? or will you have to move out of there?
if its permanent thats cool if not then go straight to the council and see what they can do!
the dog suituation is a toughie cos ur ex obviously feels like he has to take something u care about away for you to notice him!
Go to the farmer, im sure he will remeber you and explain your suituation breifly to him.just so he is aware incase it goes any further.
as for the police dont bring them in just yet, until he actually does someone physical they proberly wont do a thing!
keep your head up! i know its hard but if it was only you then u could cry all you want!you have to show your kids some stabilty and keep them happy as much as possible!
good luck with anything and if you need to chat pm me!
xxxx
October 16, 2006 at 8:36 am

#726127
1

Shit Robot

@shit-robot

Participant
Sorry to hear this,stay strong :love::love:
October 17, 2006 at 1:59 pm

#726117
1

quietRIOT

@quietriot

Member
thanks you two…thats really nice of you…..i ve seen a solicitor today an im gonna the bank over the morgage….he s fetching the dog back coz my kids are upset ….me i m just biting my tongue for now …..peace …..thanks again…you lovely peeps …..xxx:love: :love: :love: :love:
October 17, 2006 at 2:36 pm

#726123
1

Raj

@raj

Member
sorry to hear its tough going right now

:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug

stay strong and hope it gets better soon
[dont let the f*k blackmail you ever]
October 18, 2006 at 5:15 pm

#726126
1

chillidog

@chillidog

Member
sorry to here about that glad he’s returned your dog thats just totally childish.Sounds like he’s finding it extremely hard to let you and the kids go but thats no excuse for acting like he is,that saying you dont realise what you got ’till its gone comes to mind.Hope you get everything sorted out and as everyone else said stay strong :group_hug
October 18, 2006 at 7:53 pm

#726114
1

globalloon

@globalloon

Member
all you can do is keep your head

calm maturing wins over childish drama everytime, and keeps you in the right

stay strong
October 19, 2006 at 6:43 am

#726118
1

quietRIOT

@quietriot

Member
thanx means a lot …xraaa
October 19, 2006 at 7:45 am

#726113
6

General Lighting

@general-lighting

Moderator
Staff
a relative of mine had to go through a divorce case a few years ago and not responding to provocation but going through proper channels is definitely the best idea….

Your ex has also really damaged his case by the dog incident and has shown a high risk of unethical or unlawful behaviour as the settlment progresses which your solicitors should note.

A dog is part of the family too and stealing it is IMO as bad as child abduction.

I guess you and the kids will already but make sure you comfort it when it gets back as it will also be affected by all this

http://www.barkbytes.com/b4ubuy/divorce.htm
October 19, 2006 at 12:41 pm

#726119
1

quietRIOT

@quietriot

Member
hi…we got rebel back so happy bout that…my solicitor says he ll be in deep shit if he stops paying the morgage cos hes the gaurantour…spelt wrong…jus to be safe ive put my name on the housing list but thats the last thing i want…but there are people a lot eorse off than me i know that …aas long as i have my kids i ll survive…an my computer t tap away on when they are in bed…coz the winter can be lonely on your own .i know ive been there …it was harder then coz im a stronger person now…what hurts is hes told my mum all this stuff thats private …i dont get on with her well jus for kids an shes lovin hearing all the stuff …shes so negative thats why i dont get on with her reaklly…he has been telling people im this an that that hurts coz they might believe him…he takes no responsiblity for the marriage ending..its all my fault apparantly…i should have stayed an been unhappy…made my bed lie on it…………….nah dont think so…i feel like a weights been lifted t be honest…i hope he meets someone more like him in the future i could never hate him…anywayz thats that ….thanks for listening an caring….xxx
October 19, 2006 at 12:52 pm

#726130
1

freespirited

@freespirited

Member
see now u got the right idea!
just stay strong and its a good idea bout the housing list! just incase! u never know how long these things take to sort out!
glad ur getting on the right path again!
now u just gotta take what negative ppl say with a pinch of salt and think of it as its you and your kids!
you dont need anyone else to rely on. you seem a strong lady so stay strong
glad things are looking up

😀
xxx
October 19, 2006 at 1:01 pm

#726116
1

Acidfairy

@acidfairy

Member
If people believe all the things that he is saying about you then they aren’t really friends in the first place..

Break up’s are hard and they can be hard on your friends too as no one really wants to be seen taking sides as such.. so if people want to believe the nonsense he is telling them about you, let them they’re not worth worrying about, it’ll be hard but its worth it in the end..

My mum told me this little rhyme once it goes like this,
Here’s to those who wish us well,
And those who don’t can go to hell..

And remember [SIZE=-1]NIL ILLEGITIMUS CARBORUNDUM – Don’t let the bastards get you down.

Keep your chin up hun.. it’ll all work out..
Hugz
AF
xx :love:
[/SIZE]
October 19, 2006 at 4:27 pm

#726124
1

Raj

@raj

Member
April

sounds like its time to prune some dead wood fom your life and the ex and your mum should be top of your list!

if she likes him so much maybe he should move in with her and leave you alone? :weee:

In the meantime leave them to gossip like a pair of sad little spiteful people and move on with your life 😉

and I would never encourage anyone to stay in a miserable relationship for the sake of the kids – what do you think they’d learn that was positive about relationships from that?:you_crazy:you_crazy

:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug
October 19, 2006 at 6:19 pm

#726120
1

quietRIOT

@quietriot

Member
thanx yeah raj your right …. it used to hurt that my mum thoght so little of me but now i dont dwell on it …..she cant help herself…i feel sorry for her in a way…but every time i have tried to get close shes cut me down…everytime ….my kids are all ive really got yer know …i can count my freinds on one hand …i wish asometimes i was one of them peeps yer know who have loads of mates….i sorted my true mates out a few years ago they are fickle an two faced round here where i live ….i think the saying that acidfairy said is ace an i will keep saying that to myself its so true .xx thanks there dude …i stopped smoking pot an cigs alll together an fukt all the so called mates off …they just bitch about people all da time an i d had enough….the turning point was near my hen nite i asked an old good freind to come with us to sheff but she let me down to go to this stupid other thing…that was it for me……….i only smoke weed an fags when i go out now when i m drinking or on pils silly really coz rest of the time it dont ever bother me………..yer see my husband used to come out to clubs with me an hed not drink an so drive it was adeal…yey …but then he d come along then moan at mi days later that i ought to stop going out an all this ….now i m going out with people ive met off internet or from the nites i ve been going years but its hard cos my mates my close mates arent into the scene so thats why im networking to get to know new people ….its working …trouble is they are lads……funny i seem to get on with lads tho better than i do girls …telll you for why..i find a lot of women bitchy ….they judge you by looking at you some ….im not stunning by a long chalk but im slim blonde blue eyes confident… i get some women who find me a threat its stupid …cos im the most fun loving person an i d hate to hurt anyone…i like if i see an attractive girl i lllsay yeah shes pretty or oh i love yer dress….not all woen are like this just some ….anyway im way of subject….hehee! i need frinds right now….its just me an the kids …to infinateee an beyond…….
October 19, 2006 at 6:58 pm

#726125
1

Raj

@raj

Member
:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug:group_hug

I know it hurts when your parents can’t be nice to you – I have been and still am there

you have to realise that they are only human and therefore fallible and then we move on to nicer people

an arsehole is an arsehole whether a member of your family or not:groucho:
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