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PROUD TO BE BRITISH!!

Forums Life PROUD TO BE BRITISH!!

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  • > Be very proud to be British because…
    >
    > Only in Britain… can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
    >
    > Only in Britain… do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the
    > back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy
    > cigarettes at the front.
    >
    > Only in Britain… do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a
    > DIET coke.
    >
    > Only in Britain… do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the
    > counters.
    >
    > Only in Britain… do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive
    > and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
    >
    > Only in Britain… are there disabled parking places in front of a skating
    > rink.
    >
    >
    > NOT TO MENTION…
    > 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
    >
    > 142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
    >
    > 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the
    > fairylights were plugged in.
    >
    > 19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations
    > were chocolate.
    >
    > British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling
    > accidents.
    >
    > 18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
    > cigarette in their mouth.
    >
    > A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening
    > bottles of beer with their teeth.
    >
    > 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control
    > Scalextric cars.
    >
    > And finally………
    >
    > In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.
    >
    >
    > RULE BRITANNIA!!

    :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile:

    skattyasfuk wrote:
    >
    > NOT TO MENTION…
    > 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
    >
    >

    O shit, did that at X-MAS… thought it was fine not risking death. 💡 :angel_fly :angel_fly

    PaulM wrote:
    O shit, did that at X-MAS… thought it was fine not risking death. 💡 :angel_fly :angel_fly

    although some of the others seem feasible the “9 volt battery” thing is an urban legend (the “3 deaths per year” figure is quoted in joke emails all the way from here to Kazakhstan with a different country mentioned each time).

    although there are some more sensitive individuals, most humans can survive a considerable amount of electricity being passed through them if the current is low. a 9v battery cannot provide enough current to kill due to the resistance of the human body.

    It usually takes about 50-60V before voltages can be classed as hazardous. I have been shocked by a number of things over the years – mains (a good bit of advice – never just assume a circuit is switched off if you are at all unsure where it is fed from!), also a 120V DC battery feed to a comms room from a BT telephone exchange (used for some obscure ISDN kit) which was on unmarked metal terminals – I am still very much alive and well.

    that said testing 9v batteries with your tongue is neither pleasant nor an accurate indication of whether the battery is any good – a half-exhausted one will still give you a tingle. Not much good if you use it for some kit at a gig and get crap sound quality; and a lot worse if its your smoke alarm battery!

    The shops in most cities run by Asian chaps selling cheap electrical accessories often sell battery testers which are more accurate and less painful….

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Forums Life PROUD TO BE BRITISH!!