@i_hope 490354 wrote:
you are going to die soon. its one of those experiences that no-one can take away from you so you can just put that one safely in your piggy bank… but in the meantime there are so many other things to get joy from. maybe u can go travel… experience some different cultures, eat some new foods, meet some new people… spend time in a country thats doesn’t have its dick shoved so hard in plutonomics. i used to go to israel all the time and i always used to get this flat feeling coming back to the uk… a feeling of inferred depression… think i need to to the same actually! i know you’re not in the uk btw…
I just got back from hobo-travelling the US. I like being a hobo, or couch surfing. I was raised a good portion of my life homeless, so it feels more like home than where I am now… Damn suburbs.
Not saying I don’t get joy from many other things, but that’s one of those mortality deals to get excited about, reminding myself that despite all I’ve seen and done and been a part of, I’m human. It’s wonderful, because human’s an ambivalent word to me. Being human can be beautiful, or it could be disgusting and depraved depending on my mood. But either way, it’s an assumed family, a feeling of being part of something big, even if it’s shitty; especially if it’s wonderful. Tricking myself into thinking I’m going to die soon, even if it’s more probable than not, is my way of saying “I’m alive”.
Iunno, maybe I’m fucked in the head >.>
