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Friends… Really JUST friends?

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  • General Lighting wrote:
    out all the ravers I know who are parents (a fair number, nowadays) I only know of one who is in what I would call a conventional family with both parents present

    would that be me? or can you make it two?

    i know many proper party heads with well cared-for children and rich family life

    Quote:
    (one question though, what do you do about people who won’t “clear” a CRB check?

    the results of CRB checks are only relevant if the crime is relevant: certain crimes carry penalties beyond prison (like crimes against minors)

    Quote:
    Of course you someone with a history of domestic violence or other violent crime is not acceptable;

    i know a very nice man who did 8 years for arson. i know another very gentle person who did 14 years of a 15 year sentance for murder, then lived a responsible, crime-free life under an assumed name for almost 20 years. he’s now doing another 4 for escaping, thanks to a star reporter.

    both of these people committed acts that they were deeply regretful of

    the ‘arsonist’ had lost both of his (foster) parents in the space of a month and set fire to the curtains by his bed in a children’s home, where he was taken after his foster father was killed in a car crash

    the ‘muderer’, aged 21, was sleeping rough in London in the late 60’s. one night, after being given acid he was approached by a man who tried to have sex with him. he hit the man, who fell and hit his head on the road and died as a result of the injuries.

    the results of a CRB check would give you only dark names for people who have already been punished

    it’s not a good way to judge people

    a persons background is a lot more complex than a record

    and that’s all i’m going to write tonight

    (while listening to Orbital) raaa

    Something and nothing!

    Funny things arn’t they… and usually mean the other…

    Swear, i am miss negative… but i still think that even after a situation, and i might even consider going as far to say ever sitation… given enough time and space, and enough effort put into communicating and understanding.. straight up honest talk… it can be over come…

    But it’s always important to remember that talking and chatting are two different things…
    I think that if feeling are mutual and there is enough care respect and love between people in relationships and friendships then anything is possible…

    I am negative, most male friends i’ve had and have got have tried it on… told me that there in love with me and all that but, the ones i haven’t been able to get over are the ones that have made it an absolute no go situation… Sadly to say last week i broke up a friendship and will not have any communitaction with this person purly because the situation he put me in… he had a partner and has been putting pressure on me telling me that he doesn’t like the thought of me with anyone else, emotional blackmail, i don’t play games and am always to the point… i had a blow up and explained the game to him and everything that i found unacceptable and as far as i’m concerned… i can’t accept someone as a friend especially as i know how he treats his girlfriend, time and time again, i’ve said i don’t want to hear it… so being honest i’d dealt with it long enough…. i lost all the respect that i had for him

    But on the other hand… i had another friend about 6 months ago write me a love letter, 5 pages, but we were both single (i always am) and he wasn’t disrespecting anyone… thats want made the difference for me… i think if i did have a partner and someone tried it on then that would also be fully unacceptable… in the first blokes case… i think because it wasn’t me that had the partner then i saw it as not my problem and over time it was… well just unacceptable and i think things like that are totaly unfair on all involved and for someone else to put you in it that…!

    But suppose now when we do end up talking months or yeasr down the line, the boundaries are set… they now without a doubt fully understand whati see as being acceptable and unacceptable!

    I know, i always talk shit… but if your not going to talk… your quite likely to read this… and if any scenerio rings true then or even not… then just remember… true friends, they hold a part of your soul as you do there’s and there’s nothing like a complete soul… could tring to make contact be the worest thing in the world?… i think not… in fact sweetie, i know not!

    Go on… give us a big SMILE xx

    The prime fact is that the males gets attracted with women sexuality very fast, like by seeing her skirt, the colour of her skit, her shape of body, her cut (want me to explain?), and sometimes just the eye gaze! but they do get attracted sexually first towards a woman and then the rest of the feelings like friendship, love or whatever comes.

    what exactly you mean by asking for being JUST friends? Can’t you be friends even with your dance or sex partner? you can for sure. Friendship means sharing your stuffs with other person, no matter male or female. As long as you can share, you are friends. But when possesions strikes on either of the person, friendship starts losing its meaning.

    And never stuck to few people for making friends. Try to find new and new people, after all sharing emotions never ends. So keep on making new friends. If you get frustrated sometime, just tell yourself that there are many new and finer people are waiting for your friendship.

    Voila… shall we dance then now? :bounce_m: ok I’m jumping…. how about you?

    i’ve mostly always had female friends.. men half the time are assholes.. always thinking with there gonads, drinking beer and driving around in there suped up novas ( wankers ) , and singing stupid songs when drunk on mass and picking a fight with anything that moves cause they think they are hard!

    women are complex but most of the time much more fun as friends…. i have male friends but women can talk better:) but its nice to have a guy to chat so after the women just so u can turn back into being a man…

    unless like me you also have female friends who act like dudes sometimes.:)

    but in answer yes you can have long standing friendships with women ( and hot ones to ) that even though you wonder hummm would she be a really good bonk? , you respect them as friends and don’t want to ruin it…

    thats my 50p


      Staff

      :bigsmile: Is it worth it ? you risk to loose a good freind…What the heck..Maybe it is,dont know..have never tried:horay: your choice:bigsmile:

      *You're my favorite place to go to when my mind searches for peace *

      i think you can be friends with the opposite sex, the only mate i have which i have never and wouldnt dream of doing anything with is some 1 i grew up with all the way thru school and he lives 5 mins away from me now, both of us feel the same and would never see each other in a sexual way at all, its wierd cos i have other friends who i havent fancied but have had feelings for, like i want them to like me like it is a game of attraction, i wouldnt ever take it to far as i am in a relationship but still its nice to feel wanted, lusted after, k x

      BioTech wrote:
      I’ve got a few female friends who I’d call ‘just friends’ but i’d be lying (and most males would I think) if I said that the thought has never run through my head. I think it’s just natural to run thoughts like that through your head, but it doesn’t mean that it would be an ever present thought in my mind at all.

      Ditto

      There’s only 3 ways a guy can legitimately be a girl’s friend:

      1) He’s gay
      2) He’s not attracted to you
      3) He’s dating someone higher up on the ladder

      If your guy friend doesn’t fall into one of those categories, chances are he’d love to bang you at any given moment.


        Staff
        mr-t33 wrote:
        There’s only 3 ways a guy can legitimately be a girl’s friend:

        1) He’s gay
        2) He’s not attracted to you
        3) He’s dating someone higher up on the ladder

        If your guy friend doesn’t fall into one of those categories, chances are he’d love to bang you at any given moment.

        🙂

        *You're my favorite place to go to when my mind searches for peace *

        no i really dont agree with that statement….

        i for 1 am not gay,

        2, i was attracted to a few of my female friends but its a respect thing something that a LOT ok MOST of the younger generation just dont have!

        3, i was in love with my wife so the thought of ANYTHING never even crossed my mind as being faithfull it the most important thing in any relationship…

        and trying to say that someone is dating somone higher up the ladder? well thats you might just as well get out the darn catalog and pick a bloddy woman…. jees/

        women are people,, they are the only sex that can actually reproduce, they are FAR more loyal as friends than men, yes sometimes they screw with your head and really lay it on the blokes but so do guys!

        Ive been out of the dating scene for a while but now im divorced its hard trying to get in to it again as ALL the people are into speed dating IE go out and have a fun night then go home for a quick shag to see if your compatable.. WOW no thx.. what happened to all the talking for a month and getting to know someone….

        my best friends are woman and i respect them far to much to even considder sleeping with them and ive seen them naked! humph! its just a no go you dont think of TRUE friends like that!

        most the the younger men in the pubs/clubs/raves/parties now a days just treat women like a peice of ass and its disgusting!…bah.. now i need a coffee… rave on!

        or shold i say rant on…

        i think it is possible to have friends of the opposite sex you dont ever sleep with/ shag

        its not very likely that the thought never crosses your mind- thats a genetic drive
        its what you do about it that is the point – i do nothing about it and my friends all have a similar attitude to me which helps

        we do tend to deal with it as an up front issue and get it out of the way nice and early; its not unknown for several people to end up asleep in a heap at parties due to advanced wreckage status and this is totally safe for everyone involved

        it does require emotional maturity and respect for the other people which is sadly lacking in many folk – to the point where they will even make advances on people who are obviously part of a couple :you_crazy:you_crazy:you_crazy

        this can be really annoying when your partner is standing next to you as you are peeling off the unwanted propositioner – fortunately my partner trusts me implicitly and vice versa – otherwise many arguements would have ensued from both sides:you_crazy:you_crazy:you_crazy

        i dont get this behaviour at all – you tell them point blank you are not interested and they just carry on being endless about it – why can they not just take the hint and p*ss off when you make it clear you are not interested? i get royally fed up of having to rescue or be rescued from people who know who my partner is:rant::rant::rant::rant: or to rescue my friends, who are in relationships,:rant::rant::rant::rant: from unwanted sexual advances from random muppets:rant::rant::rant::rant::rant:

        its just so bloody RUDE when the muppets wont take the hint and persist in hassling the obviously uninterested party:rant::rant::rant::rant::rant:

        /me stops ranting [at least for a bit anyway]

        raj do me a favour dont rescue me.. im in need of a good woman 🙂 if you see a acceptable female chatting me up JUST LET THEM lol…

        as i trust your judgement 🙂 and yes i know DUMP MY EX lolo…

        TK-421 wrote:
        raj do me a favour dont rescue me.. im in need of a good woman 🙂 if you see a acceptable female chatting me up JUST LET THEM lol…

        as i trust your judgement 🙂 and yes i know DUMP MY EX lolo…

        you are definetely available mate and i would just egg them on:groucho::groucho:

        i wont rescue you unless she is a total disaster area:wink:


          Staff
          raj wrote:
          you are definetely available mate and i would just egg them on:groucho::groucho:

          i wont rescue you unless she is a total disaster area:wink:

          LOL :laugh_at: :laugh_at:

          *You're my favorite place to go to when my mind searches for peace *


            Staff
            raj wrote:
            :groucho::groucho:i wont rescue you unless she is a total disaster area:wink:

            I guess i have no chance here :groucho: :groucho: :groucho:

            *You're my favorite place to go to when my mind searches for peace *

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          Forums The Vibe Family & Friends Friends… Really JUST friends?