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How does a person get to heaven? Answer inside.

Forums Life Spirituality, Morality & Religion How does a person get to heaven? Answer inside.

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  • To go to heaven you have to be fucking dense enough to believe in divine beings based on nothing.

    @tryptameanie 973673 wrote:

    To go to heaven you have to be fucking dense enough to believe in divine beings based on nothing.

    Staying in Purgatory appears to be a great deal more fun anyway than every depiction of Christian Heaven I have heard of – (and those of other religions too, including the Pagan/New Age ones).

    if you have to give up your vices to get to Heaven and also learn the things you did not do on Earth as well as work hard then surely there must still be whatever stuff available that was the cause of the vices in the first place in Purgatory ; as well as colleges/Universities and factories / warehouses. A great number of the protection angels are shared between Christianity, Islam, Judaism and some turn up elsewhere; so would never be able to monitor everything at once.

    Plenty of opportunities for amusement in this kind of environment :laugh_at:

    @Gylfì Guðbjörnsson 881585 wrote:

    to get heaven you go down the M25 down to yarmouth……oh wait, thats haven holidays…..bugger

    For middle class English Christian heaven (including the Protestants) he’s not too far off but it would be round the M25 East; north via A12/A14 and ultimately to Southwold. Where they have a brewery, the coast to look at, at least one church but absolutely no nightclubs and the youngest people found there (who have not merely been sent there for work) are about 60.

    Staines is the land of gods, as is slough, enfield and twatt, the one in Shetland and the one in the Orkney’s.

    I had a chat on the telephone with Tryptameanie yesterday which was really good given current circumstances [my mum passed away recently following a hospital addmission by Emergency Ambulance after a long term illness suddenly got worse – she had to be admtted to one of the care homes I work in for the last few days of her life].

    This might seem really random bug Shortly before this ( I had not even been indluging in the usual combination of RCs etc) I had this strange dream that Mum and Dad were reunited in some “new place”

    .It was similar to our old family house in SE England but I could only see them as a “visitor”; and when I looked out of the window of this place there was woods and mountains rather than the main road that was outside (a bit like Austria/Tirol) both my parents had gone back to their early middle age (about 50) and were cured of most of their ailments and at peace together; at least one of our cats was also there. Dad who always liked his gadgets even had acquired a “new” mobile phone” but it looked like this .


    however this model was never sold in UK; only in more remote bits of Northern Europe where they used a different system [NMT450]. The house was sort of like a “sheltered house for middle aged people” but not for those who are unwell; more like those houses up mountains that older folk in Northern Europe like to live in,

    another random thing I only recently found out was although mum was a Lutheran, she was married in a Catholic church in Kuala Lumpur (it is still there) and somewhere along the line was gifted a rosary that some sisters in Malaysia Dad somehow knew which had apparenly been blessed by Pope St John Paul; but this was nowhere the be found (the one that was hanging over her bed in the nursing home belongs to my aunt; although Lutherans and Catholics use the same kind).

    I wouldn’t have been influenced by stuff on Flickr as although my friend Andrea does live in AT she hadn’t been taking pictures of mountains recently everyone else I know is too young to remember NMT mobiles; it was like a genuine sign that my parents were united in Heaven.

    Mum and Dad did stay married all their life; it was like Dad had just been let out of Purgatory to join her.

    I might try and get one of the NL pirates to play this for them (as they are always playing tunes for their friends and relatives who are in Heaven – and Dad probably had to learn German as part of his penance (he tried to learn it in the 1970s but got distracted by the 70s party lifestyle and then ending up with two kids)

    At least this mean when I end up in Purgatory Iwhen there are weekend activities on Friday after prayers [that all young folk including the Muslims join in] I might not have to join the same work party as Dad. As I expect just as on Earth if you have to work with your Dad he will always tell you you are doing everythng wrong and you must do it some other way….

    DAt ericsson yo… this season lol

    Thats really cool GL, I have my own thoughts on it but I’m glad you seem at peace with it.

    there was a further part to this vision (which I later found out is classed as 100% spiritually valid for a Catholic according to both St John “Don” Bosco (who was granted visions of Heaven, Hell and Purgatory) and Mother Angelica (RIP) (she went Upstairs herself exactly around Easter,).

    The house contained an unusual “guest room”, with a single bed. It appeared to be laid out more for the use of someone in later years. On the wall above the bed was a 1970s era intercom control panel/loudspeaking telephone (of the sort found in a very posh hotel for calling up room service etc).

    This contained a large window which looked out onto a woodland track full of unusual shrubbery with multi coloured flowers (a surreal mixture of plants found on earth – I since learned that (at least for some Germans especially Lutherans) original “Christmas Tree” was based on the tree Adam and Eve ate the apples from, of course apples don’t normally grow on those trees! The Bible isn’t particularly zoologically or biologically accurate on some aspects and Luthers translation in fact mangled it further and left out some important bits.

    Through the windows I could see no motor cars or any other traffic/people, some (domestic) cats were running around outside (none of these were our pets though, presumably they belonged to other families).

    It was unclear of the exact distance between the guest room and my parents house, although both buildings appeared to be in some way connected .

    This room appeared to be also laid out for someone who might wish to pray in private, but whilst being good enough to get into Heaven was of another faith or denomination.

    Other than my parents, it was only our white cat (the one I meowed with!) that I saw in the house, he was running around and later sleeping on a large pile of cushions in a spare room (he was usually forbidden from doing this!), much of the house (even by the standards of its “minimalist” North European design) seemed to lack furniture other a big glass table that were popular in 1970s (we indeed had one back then), which was where Dad had set down the mobile/cordless phone handset (the Ericsson above was the nearest approximation I could think of but it was also similar to various long range cordless sets linked to ISDN systems especially in DE and NL from late 1980s onwards).

    There were however no car keys, betting slips nor ashtray, lighter and cig packets on the table; and not even a television set anywhere to be seen, yet Dad seemed happy to do without all of these. It really did look like the house was for a young couple who had “just been let in” presumably the rest of the furniture arrives later (as well as the pets) and in the meantime they are supposed to occupy their time with wandering in the woods and prayer (as there is not need to be afraid of bears, snakes or tigers as they are all friendly)

    I couldn’t see what was beyond the windows in the room where my parents where, as there was about >100 Klx of light on that side, too strong for human eyes to cope with (this is also a very common factor mentioned in Catholic visions of Heaven).

    Nor could I work out back then what the guest area was for (I even wondered if it was a subtle warning to look after myself a bit better, or I would eventually end up in the same place, although I am no way good enough yet to get to Heaven anyway).

    Over the last years my Nan in Malaysia’s health had been steadily declining (including going down badly with dementia), although she also retained her (Lutheran) faith.

    In October she passed away, during the exact same week this happened…

    Pope jokes in ecumenical meeting: Who is better – Catholics or Lutherans? – ROME REPORTS

    She had never been particularly happy with my Mum marrying Dad (as he was a Catholic and a different nationality but forgave her in 1977 when I spoke to my Nan for the first time on the telephone. it was around that time I became fascinated by the concept that just two copper wires could be connected to a radio transmitter 300km away and then 10000km more and you could speak directly to someone at the other end which sparked my interests (and career) of today…

    So the guest room would be exactly the sort of thing my Nan would appreciate (even if she is presumably in a different district of Heaven where the Lutherans go to).

    As the Pope said : “wenn Sie sind alle zuzammen” :

    Also found this from the year I was conceived (the lyrics below fit in with my family situation).

    Deine Mutter und dein Vater
    waren erst einmal dagegen.
    Du sagtest:”Er wird nun immer bei mir sein
    auf all meinen Wegen.”
    Und ich glaube, was du damals sagtest,
    das gilt auch noch heute, es bleibt für uns so schön,
    Und daß wir Zwei uns lieben,
    das können alle Leute seh’n.

    200mg MDMA, 8mg DOC, and if you feel comfortable, 35mg of 5-MeO-MALT, plus the company of a wonderful lady and fuck me if that’s not heaven, it’s pretty fucking close 😉


      @Angel 646428 wrote:

      :you_crazy :you_crazy :you_crazy sorry dude..

      NO NO NO, : HE IS :you_crazy, TOTALLY DISTURBED :crazy:, BRAIN WASHED :weee:, JUST A BIT MORE HOPELESS :hopeless: THAN ME …..

      I know how am gonna be accepted in HEAVEN, I gonna bring a big joint with me to smoke with JESUS. I know he will enjoy and let me pass :big-joint:

      I wonder how heaven is, hell might be more fun.

      @Digital Buddha 987410 wrote:

      that is guaranteed to be played at least once on a Dutch pirate station this weekend :laugh_at: (when they do play English tracks they are invariably either 80s synthpop / europop or “power ballads” from USA!)

      As they should!!






        It would be good to meet Jesus and talk to him about this. Or to be smarter because I just am not sure I understand.






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      Forums Life Spirituality, Morality & Religion How does a person get to heaven? Answer inside.