UK : East : A fox goes pubbing in Felixstowe.. It seems this sort of thing is normal for Suffolk....
Bar 129 customer Chris Strang, of Quilter Road, Felixstowe, said: “I was with some friends having a Christmas drink when the fox wandered in searching for scraps and showed no fear as it sat under our table and then wandered around the bar,” he said.
“It was bizarre - people did a double-take. It was so tame people even stroked it.”
http://www.eveningstar.co.uk/content/eveningstar/news/story.aspx?brand=ESTOnline&category=News&tBrand=ESTOnline&tCategory=News&itemid=IPED25%20Dec%202007%2015%3A46%3A35%3A917
Don’t believe everything you read Dear All:
My thanks to all those who have sent me emails this past year....
I must send my thanks to whomever sent me the one about rat shit in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towl with every envelope that needs sealing.
Also, I now have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.
I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny
Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time
I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program....
Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants to split $7 million
with me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who died in testate.
I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,207 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.
I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I
forward the email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five
minutes.
Because of somebody's concern I no longer drink Coca-Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer can buy gas without taking a friend along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl into my back seat while I'm filling up.
I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.
Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt.
And thanks to your great advice, I can't even pick up the $5.00 I found dropped in the car park because it probably was placed there by somebody waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.
If you don't send this email to at least 144,000 people in the next 70
minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p.m.
this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump.I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.
By the way ... a South American scientist after a lengthy study has
discovered that people with low IQ's who have infrequent sexual activiy always read their emails with their hand on the mouse.
Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.
Author Unknown
:laugh_at::laugh_at::laugh_at:
Magic beer A lady walks into a fancy high-rise restaurant and sees a really
cute guy sitting at the bar. She goes over and asks him what he is
drinking.
"Magic Beer", he says.
She thinks he's a little crazy, so she walks around the bar a bit, but
after realizing that there is no one else worth talking to, goes
back to the man sitting at the bar and says, "That isn't really Magic Beer,
is it?"
"Yes, I'll show you."
He takes a swig of the beer, jumps out the window, flies around the
building 3 times and comes back in the window. The lady can't
believe it: "I bet you can't do that again."
He takes another swig of beer, jumps out the window, flies around
the building 3 times, and comes back in the window.
She is so amazed that she says she wants a Magic Beer, so the guy
says to the barman, "Give her one of what I'm having."
She gets her drink, takes a gulp of the beer, jumps out the window,
plummets 30 floors, breaks every bone in her body and dies.
The bartender looks up at the guy and says, "You know, Superman,
you're a real prick when you're drunk."
UK : East : Mice keep OAP’s car off the road..
Quote:
He believes that mice are to blame for completely filling the car's air cleaner with peanuts.
http://www.eadt.co.uk/content/eadt/news/story.aspx?brand=EADOnline&category=News&tBrand=EADOnline&tCategory=News&itemid=IPED17%20Dec%202007%2010%3A51%3A42%3A707
Is this too horrible? ok, so my friend tells me this joke the other day, and i thought it was really mean, but what do you think? :crazy:
what did the blind and deaf kid get for christmas?
cancer.
HA HA HA I got in trouble the other day, I bought a stuffed bear for a tenner, sold it for £20 and the sudanese goverment's trying to get me done for making a prophet out of a teddy...
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