An events calendar from the US Found this link while rummaging about on the net:
http://harpers.org/subjects/Drugs/SubjectOf/Event
Has its humourous moments...
the simple ones are the Best………… PINCHED FROM OTHER SITE FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT...:love:
The comic genius that was Tommy Cooper! This has probably been here before but I just saw it in my email and had to post it again.
1. Two blondes walk into a building..........you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.
2. Phone answering machine message - "...If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key..."
3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts. The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."
4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."
6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
7. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't, I've cut your arms off".
8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.
9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.
10. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.
11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says "I'll give you some cream to put on it."
12. 'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home' "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. 'Is it common?' "It's not unusual."
13. A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed? ""No, because he's really heavy"
14. Guy goes into the doctor's. "Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside." "How's that?" "Don't you start."
15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!
16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
17. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'
18. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu? But I think its Colin.
20. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
21. "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice."
22. A man walked into the doctors, he said, "I've hurt my arm in several places" The doctor said, "Well don't go there anymore"
23. Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night .
natural intoxication not that i have tried any chemical drugs, but only natural ones(at the moment), this is a quesiton that i forgot to ask right at the start of when i joined. Should we be putting all these chemicals into our blood stream, or doesnt it matter and its just doing the same damage as a paracetemol, or are natural drugs doing the same damage as chemies.
Best of luck to all of you doing exams should have put this post up earlier in the year but for me the times and dates of exams (thankfully) are increasingly a distant memory..
I'm sure they are happening earlier in the year than when I used to have them.
Bah, I am getting confused by all this "new edjumacation" type stuff as I get older....
inflatable stars Decorations Inflatable Stars, Marquee Decorations, Star Mobiles, Special Event Decor, Aerial Hangings, Overhead Features.
Each Inflatable Star has its own internal fan which keeps it permanently inflated. They also come with a light bulb that can be changed (pink, green or UV) fitted in to a BC cap fitting inside. They are made from wight UV active material and are lightweight. They are hung from a single clip hook and come with a 5m cable.
240v 30w 150cm wide
£100 each
light up or just uv
any one interested send me an email freeytrap@yahoo.co.uk
Making a bet in a bar :laugh_at::laugh_at::laugh_at: Must be blond guys
Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy.
Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money.
"I can't take your money," said the first guy. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said the second guy. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"
Stanton C314 deck for sale (just the one) sounds odd im just selling one but to be honest with you all ive been offered a full turntable set up for not a lot sooo one of my cd's has got to go ...
itd be a great add-on for any set up. easy to use and in mint condition
box, instructions and everything included ...
erm, id like a little over 200 squid for it to help pay for the turntables im being offered ...
thank you all,
digital-a
pm me or just post up on here :-) merci buttercup
Reported post in : Spirit Base: Austrias First Big Music Festival in Summer 2007 The following post has been reported ;
Thread : [thread=24726]Spirit Base: Austrias First Big Music Festival in Summer 2007[/thread]
[post=122880]Original Post[/post] by tomrom :
tomrom wrote:
Spirit Base: Austrias First Big Music Festival in Summer 2007
Visitors from all over Europe for 5 days of nonstop music expected
Finally the summer has come and Austria is expecting the first big music festival in summer 2007 for 5 days. Thousends of fans from all over Austria and Europe – especially from Eastern Europe - will come to the beautiful location not far from the Hungarian border and about an hour drive away from Vienna. The Spirit Base festival will take place from May 31st to June 4th in the small village of Markt Allhau. 37 live-acts and 47 DJs from all over Europe, Israel and the USA will provide nonstop music for 5 days. Spirit Base changed the location this year to Markt Allhau close to a beautiful lake for swimming and big camping grounds. The mythical decoration will be formed with palm trees, egyptian sphinxes and pyramides. Blacklight decorations and larger-than-life projections of light-artists such as the internationally renowned VJ El Geko will contribute to a perfect background from outer space. The Spirit Base festival will 2007 be decorated as an oasis from a parallel universe and visitors will be beamed into a world beyond Stargate. At the festival the music lovers will find a huge camping ground, showers, toilets and a vast market area with club-wear, bars, restaurants and tents. For the hot nights there will be seen lots of performances and fire-shows. Musicwise the whole festival will be a tribute to Progressive Trance, Full-on and Ambient- and Chillout-music.
Presale tickets can be ordered online for 45 Euro until May 25th on www.spirit-base.at. At the festival tickets will be sold between 15 and 60 Euro for one to five days of stay.
More information on www.spirit-base.at.
Reason Given : I trashed it first ooops
will post the pm i sent on this thread momentarily
Mao ‘s portrait in Tiananmen Square was burned . [FONT=宋体]A man damaged a portrait of Mao Zedong that hangs over Tiananmen Square in central Beijing. The man, identified as Gu Hai'ou, from the northwestern city of Urumqi, threw a burning object at the portrait of communist China's first leader on afternoon of June 12th, the Xinhua News Agency said.[/FONT]
irritating kids in the chat room
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they are contributing nothing to the forum and clogging the chatroom up for hours at a time :you_crazy:you_crazy:you_crazy while being offensive to each other
maybe the ip could be blocked for a week or three as was done once to another group of schoolkids? make them go clog up someone else's site :groucho:
Australian Poetry Competition The Australian Poetry Competition had come down to two finalists; a university graduate and an old aboriginal.
They were given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word.
The word they were given was 'TIMBUKTU'
First to recite his poem was the university graduate.
He stepped to the microphone and said:
Slowly across the desert sand,
Trekked a lonely caravan
Men on camels two by two
Destination - Timbuktu.
The crowd went crazy! No way could the old aboriginal top that, they thought.
The old aboriginal calmly made his way to the microphone and recited;
Me and Tim a huntin' went
Met three whores in a pop up tent
They were three, and we was two
So I bucked one, and timbuktu.
The aboriginal won.
:laugh_at:
Police get new powers to evict anti-social residents from their own homes [FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]Antisocial owners could be made homeless
· Justice should be swift, says home secretary[/FONT] [FONT=Geneva,Arial,sans-serif]
[/FONT] Sweeping new instant justice powers are to be given to the police to evict "neighbours from hell" and other antisocial residents as part of home secretary John Reid's law and order legislation to be unveiled in the Queen's speech today.Mr Reid said he wanted to give police the immediate power to close down premises being used for drunken parties, raves, brothels or other persistent antisocial activity, and to "move away from the traditional view that justice has to involve going to court".
full story:
http://politics.guardian.co.uk/homeaffairs/story/0,,1948056,00.html
another source:
http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/news/article-23396583-details/Police+get+new+powers+to+evict+anti-social+residents+from+their+own+homes/article.do
:hopeless: :you_crazy :hopeless:
fuck off reid :yakk: useless authoritarian cunt, its another clampdown n power that reduces our fuckin freedom.
and to think reid used to be left wing :you_crazy
What Celebs will look like in 2037 Have you ever wondered what celebs will look like in 2037? Well i have recieved some pictures giving us some insight into what they will be looking like (plastic surgery could change the results) :weee:
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