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Crisis Thread Hey Vibers.
I'm starting this thread cos at the moment I'm havin a real tough time with my fluctuating mental health. I don't necessarily expect any useful advice in return I simply want to unload. It all started when I was an infant, my biological father left when I was very young and was replaced to put it politely by an utter cunt of a step dad. He soon had a child with my mum meaning I had a brother 5 years younger than me. My stepfather soon made it apparent I wasn't welcome in his ideal family as I wasn't his blood. For about a decade I put up with him telling me I was useless and a waste of space, as a kid you don't resist and it slowly sank in even though I didn't want to believe it. He was calculated and only ever subjected me to this psychological abuse when my mother wasn't around and when I tried telling her how bad I felt her response was you're a hormonal teen it will pass. When I was 15 I snapped one day and punched him busting his nose, the abuse stopped but the damage was done. Ever since I've suffered periods of extreme depression and have attempted suicide once though many years ago. Also when alone I suffer fits of rage (obviously my undealt with issues manifesting). It's like a switch in my brain flicks without any or the smallest of triggers and I trash the house. Some of you will have already seen a couple of posts regarding this but lately is becoming more intense and frequent. I'm pretty scared that at some point I'm just going to snap and if not hurt myself hurt someone else. It feels as though a lot of my sadness is turning to anger. I am already seeing a psychiatrist btw. But what do peeps think? And sorry for the morbid post.12…1213
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If You Really Knew Me This is my 'If You Really Knew Me' video. It explain some but not all of the things I've been through. I wanted to add songs but my editing app on my tablet wouldn't allow me to do so, so listen to your own if you wish or listen to the ones I was going to use: Eminem-Mockingbird, 25 to Life, Space Bound, Talking to Myself. If you want to know anymore than what's in the video feel free to ask and I invest my emotions into Tumblr so this is my URL if you'd like to see it notsosmiles.tumblr.com
Now for the video, enjoy...I hope
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrHgV68ZmEM1234
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sorry to bother you… Sorry to bother you but I don't know what to do anymore. I'm sorry for anyone thinking I'm just some kid wasting your time but please trust that's not my intention.
I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like there is no point for me to live... that I should leave... for everyone's benefit.
I'm not happy and I don't think its possible I ever will be, I never had a "real" happiness, I was just oblivious to the bullshit and everything going on. I've totally hit rock bottom in this hell and I can't get out.
My thoughts scream "Cut down as deep as you can over and over until there's nothing left." "Never eat you fucking pig, you deserve to starve, you deserve to purge."
This shit is taking me hostage and I can't get out and I don't know what to do anymore. I want so bad to finally have peace and be happy but I need that now before I'm totally destroyed, emotionally and physically. I don't have a fear of dying its just the part that's unknown about it that scares me but the fact that I won't ever be able to be hurt again and I can leave all of my past behind me is something to make me want it more.I just don't want to get that far and have it all be a mistake.
I just don't know...
Thanks for reading and I'm sorry if I wasted your time with any of this.123
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Mid Winter Blues or Depression I have recently lost a beloved friend to depression [he committed suicide] and it was a huge shock to me and all his other friends.
The not knowing if there was something more we could have done for him has been very hard though especially as not everyone even realised he had a problem and the people in whom he had confided are struggling with the guilt of the 'what if I had done......?' scenarios.
:arrow: Depression seems to me to be a subject which could use much more open discussion about it and I am writing this thread in case you or someone you know is depressed and dont know what to do about it.
What is depression?
The symptoms include:
* Disturbed sleep, usually waking early and being unable to get back to sleep
* A general slowing down of thought, speech and movement
* Feelings of anxiety
* Tearfulness for no reason
* Short temper
* Lack of energy and constant exhaustion
* Inability to enjoy things
* Lack of concentration
* Difficulty making decisions
* Feeling that you're forgetful
* Negative thoughts about the future
* Feelings of guilt
* Loss of identity
* Blaming self and low self-esteem
* Feelings of hopelessness and despair
* Unrealistic sense of failure
* Loneliness, even when around others
* Becoming preoccupied with illness
* Loss of appetite and resulting loss of weight
* Reduced desire for sex
* Variation of mood during the day. It's often worse in the morning, improving as the day goes on - but the pattern can be the other way around.
[Depending on the severity of the depression more or less symptoms may be affecting you.]
Depression can be triggered by a wide variety of things: the SAD [seasonal affective depression] is brought on by the lack of light in winter, a relationship breakdown [any family member not just a partner], a change in circumstances [loss of a job, moving], some medical treatments or illnesses, having a baby [post natal depression] and many other things.
The important thing to realise is that if you are depressed you are not the only one and that there is help available out there.12…67
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Feel Better In The Morning Or Evening? I ask because I was reading up about Anhedonia and it said this
[FONT=verdana, geneva, lucida, lucida grande, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]
[/FONT]People suffering from anhedonia in association with depression generally feel good in the morning and unhappy in the evenings and can portray any of the non-psychotic symptoms and signs of depression.[FONT=verdana, geneva, lucida, lucida grande, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]
[/FONT]Personally I hate the mornings and feel much better at night, that said I don't feel sad in the morning just tired and lazy and achy.
Let me know Partyvibe squadrin.
UK : England : Exam stress, health problems led to 145 suicides amongst ages 10-19 This (which is the equivalent of 10 high school classrooms emptied) is shockingly bad for a so-called "developed country" in Europe.
On top of the poorly managed / under-resourced schools and the dangerous roads it now leads to multicultural families leaving England with their babies and children or the mother and children returning to their home country (splitting up the family) - which is also bad - babies and children are valuable and there is a global shortage of them.
Acne and exam stress among factors leading young people to suicide, study finds | Society | The Guardian
How to maximize supplements absorption? Eat a balanced diet and you can get rid of the majority of your supplements. It has been a long time since anyone has suffered from vitamin overdose problems but be careful not to overdo it...
Thanks I've been a bit dormant recently but decided to take a break from PV. For some of you this is my only means of communication hence why i'm making a thread to notify. I've got a lot of things to sort out as well as having some issues with depression and my mental health so unfortunately don't really have the time or motivation to post at the moment. I'm taking some time away to detox and to think hard. thank all the people i've spoken to on here, you're a cool bunch. Definitely the best internet community I've ever been involved in. Hope to return at some point in the future. It's been fun, speak soon!
Peace
A friend with depression… Need advice Hi guys. I'm in desperate need of some advice from you people as i know a lot of you are really knowledgeable and give good advice. This is gonna be along one...
Okay so basically i have a female friend who I'm very close to, (probably one of my best female friends) who I've been good friends with for probably 4 or 5 years. In the past month or so i noticed her change a LOT. Her whole character and personality seemed almost non existent and i saw little of her at school which i found quite odd. A few weeks ago i receive a phone call from her with her just crying down the phone and saying how she cut herself down her arm and it wouldn't stop bleeding. I found this really quite stressful as I've never had experience with a situation like this before let alone to one of my best friends. I began to receive more and more of these calls of her just crying down the phone and texts saying how she can't stop crying. I ask her why she is crying? She says she doesn't know she just can't stop. I know she's been self harming more and more. Her brother had his 18th birthday party at the weekend and today i was chatting to her closest female friend who was really shocked and seemed uneasy. I ask what happened and she tells me that she locked herself in the bathroom and started throwing glasses at the mirror and cut her arms with it. I don't know if alcohol played any role in this, but i know she isn't usually a huge drinker and doesn't use any drugs of any kind. Her friend doesn't really know the full extent of her self harm but she is also really worried about her now.
She has a boyfriend, is fairly popular, very privileged and to the untrained eye has a great life. I've talked to her quite a bit (when she isn't crying) and tried my best to advise her and told her to talk to a family member but she simply refuses. She hasn't even told her boyfriend about it ONLY me and one other know. I feel like i need to do something but i don't know what and it's really frustrating. She is telling me she thinks it's getting worse and that one day soon she will just snap, which is quite scary really. What do we think i should do? Cheers if you've taken the time to read this means a lot.12
Best Global Depression Tunes! ok then folks, what are the most fitting tunes for these crashing, crunching, lean and mean times?
I'll start the ball rolling by showin off my inability to post youtube clips (feel free to help me out here!).
I give u the rather appropriate 'Wall St Shuffle' by 10cc.
YouTube - The Wall Street Shuffle12
Do i suffer from depression? i think it must of started when i was around 13/14 when i got into my first serious relationship, whenever i use to have a problem about something, whether it was me not getting my own way, her not saying the things that i wanted to hear or even if i had a negative thought in my head............i would be depressed. I dont need to sound so 'emo' about this as such but i've always found it a problem, i would become quiet, emotional, rarely cry but have done and just don't know what the problem is, i never want to talk about it, and when people do try and attempt to talk to me, i just find it incredibily difficult to voice my words.
i've kind of started to take it a little bit seriously, since i had a stage in my life where i was single for a year, i can't recall getting depressed or these 'mood swings' as such throughout that period. But i have just started to see this girl, i really like her very much but she has said that things aren't going to work out because i am 'emotionally unstainable', which of course made me even more upset.
so i don't know what peoples opinions on this are, i would like to go and see my GP about it but i am afraid that he may not be very helpful, or i could just be inconsiderate. i would like to blaime drugs for my mentality but i've only been doing drugs for around the last 3 years in my life (since i was 17). i've had a pretty rocky childhood, emotional wise since i haven't exactly found it easy to talk to my parents about things or anybody for that matter, but i'm just not too sure whats happening with me, and i feel very trapped and insecure right now and like everybody, they want to work at making things better for things or perhaps people they care about.
i would very much like peoples opinions on this matter and thank you for everybodys help.
much love.12
UK : how medieval clampdowns on fun led to rising depression rates A long article but worth a read (I might buy the book its plugging as well!)
I definitely agree with the findings, as it all ties in with the rise of more puritain lifestyles from the 1600s onwards and that sort of mentality still exists throughout middle Europe (not just the UK) even today. The flipside of course is that puritans and conservatives often do very well in business due to their disciplined lives..
I think it fits in with the "type A vs type B" personalities thread as well..
http://lifeandhealth.guardian.co.uk/health/story/0,,2047969,00.html
